Princess of Mars

2009

Sci-Fi / Thriller / War

4
Rotten Tomatoes Critics - Rotten 10%
Rotten Tomatoes Audience - Spilled 10% · 250 ratings
IMDb Rating 3.2/10 10 1950 2K

princess planet mars space battle swordswoman outer space

Plot summary

Based on the novel by Edgar Rice Burroughs, a US soldier finds himself inexplicably transported to Mars in the midst of a war between two alien races.

Director

Mark Atkins Photo
Mark Atkins

Top cast

Matt Lasky Photo
Matt Lasky as Tars Tarkas
Antonio Sabato Jr. Photo
Antonio Sabato Jr. as John Carter
Gregory Paul Smith Photo
Gregory Paul Smith as Spaceship Gunner
Tomas Boykin Photo
Tomas Boykin as Cornwell Sams
720p.WEB 1080p.WEB
861.53 MB
1280*720
English 2.0
NR
Subtitles us  
23.976 fps
1 hr 33 min
Seeds ...
1.73 GB
1920*1080
English 5.1
NR
Subtitles us  
23.976 fps
1 hr 33 min
Seeds 1

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by JoeB131 4 / 10

How To Make An Asylum Film

1) Find a big-budget movie you can somehow associate your cheap knockoff with. That's easy, they are in development for years, while your ripoff can be made in a few weeks.2) Try to claim it is linked to some book in the Public Domain. H.G Wells, Arthur Conan Doyle and Edgar Rice Burroughs won't turn into literary Zombies and march on your offices. (Although that would be more interesting that most asylum films, come to think of it.) 3) Get some washed up actors. People that you might have heard of, but aren't getting good roles these days.4) Cheap Special Effects- Get some of those kookie You-Tube kids to make your monsters...badly edited them into the film. 5) Pad out 10 minutes of plot with an hour of fight scenes and wandering through the desert scenes.Okay, Really, I'm going to say some nice things about this film. It's actually better than your average Asylum film, but that's like saying it's the least trampy Jerry Springer guest.They've actually remained somewhat faithful to the Burroughs story, updating it a bit. (Carter is still from Virginia, but now he's an ex-Green Beret instead of an ex-Confederate officer.) Honestly, the weakest part of the film was Traci Lords. She's never been a good actress, and you can tell she's in her forties every time they did a close up. Honestly, the girl who played the lizard chick was more attractive. Or at least firm in the places a woman should be firm.Hey, I noticed something else. Ever notice in an asylum film, they have a lot of gunplay, but the muzzles of the weapons are almost always out of frame when they are being fired? I guess someone didn't budget for blank ammunition, but sound effects are always cheap. And Martians have 50 cals and Kalishnikovs, just like we do on earth.
Reviewed by RSLent 4 / 10

This desperately needs a Phantom Edit

This movie stumbles badly right away. There's no real need to update it, it works better if it isn't updated. But that's not the real failing. The scene where he is in the hospital being told by some mad scientists that he is being sent to Mars as some sort of science experiment was one of the most absurd that I have ever seen. It was unintentionally comic. Why in the world did they need to declare that Barsoom isn't Mars, but a planet in another solar system? Yes, we know that the real Mars isn't like the Mars that Burroughs imagined, that doesn't interfere with the story.There is a scene were he asks for something to drink, and he is given a rag full of sweat. Another scene where he asks for food, and he is given the excretion of some larva. Neither of these are in the book; they eat something that seems like cheese or tofu, and to drink, they drink the liquid of a cactus-like plant. Why they chose to make this change is beyond me. It seemed to be an attempt to disgust the audience, and didn't make the movie any better.A good Phantom Edit would cut out entirely the portion before he gets to Mars. A minute of two of narration at the beginning could replace the entire first part of the movie. It would also be necessary to snip out the part where you learn the bad guy is from Earth. You don't have to eliminate him entirely, just the nonsense of him being from Earth.I'd also delete the scenes where he is given sweat and larval excretions to drink.Other parts are more minor. Traci Lords is a bit too old, too clothed and too blonde to be a plausible Deja Thoris. She seems more a cranky sitcom mom than a princess of Helium. The tattoos on John Carter seem unlikely, a tramp stamp on a man? But these are minor, the major flaws of this movie are overwhelming, but if they were cut out, this would be, well, not a great movie, but not too bad.If you watch the movie, you see that throughout the movie, one of Tars Tarkas' tusks wobbles. A fairly minor thing, but it shows how quickly they made this movie was made.
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